NOW PLAYING: The Anthrax, The Airlines & The American People

31 October, 2001
The American People must get back to living their normal lives, says President Bush. Well, here we are six weeks after the terrorist attacks on September 11, and things are decidedly not normal, Sparky.

Let's see what we've got, shall we?

THE ANTHRAX
As an opening note, I'm amused by how many people are referring to anthrax spores as "The" anthrax — kind of like when old Emma Sue passed on and someone asks why. "Well, they say she got... (whispers) the Cancer." Now it's, "That envelope in Daschle's office was full of... The Anthrax."

Speaking of which, isn't it interesting that with the first reports of "The Anthrax" how the Government told us all "not to panic," but as soon as their lily-livered butts might get close to an anthrax letter it was "Eeek! We gotta close down the Congress!! It's The Anthrax! Run away! Where's my Cipro?!"

Meanwhile, down at the Post Office, those folks have a zillion envelopes whizzing by all day long, but there's no shutting down for them... Interesting, also, that it was quite a while after our brave Congresscritters ran from D.C. with their tails tucked 'tween their legs before someone finally thought "Hey, maybe we ought to think about testing those Postal workers that might have handled our envelopes full of anthrax, eh?"

Our valiant elected officials are looking out for the "security" of the rest of the American People all the time. Yeppers. Of course, we were probably safest during the time when Congress was shut down and they weren't passing some diabolical new laws and taking more of our freedom or money (or both)...

With the Media running "All Anthrax, All the Time" news on the tube, it's no wonder that the really scary bioweapons stuff isn't getting any play; people would freak if they knew about things like Smallpox. If you're concerned about "The Anthrax," take a look at a fictional Smallpox Scenario written by Dr. Tara O'Toole at the CDC. Or read Richard Preston's (author of The Hot Zone) article in The New Yorker from July 12, 1999. It's called "The Demon in the Freezer," and you'll pee your pants.

"The Anthrax" is a paper cut compared to "The Pox." If you want to worry, worry about that.

THE AIRLINES
The Washington Post ran an article the other day stating that airline capacity is still down 23% from before 9-11, and that's with a reduced number of flights. So obviously, people aren't exactly hustling down to the airports to travel — they aren't all stupid.

"Security" has been increased, we're told. Right. We've got National Guard soldiers with M16 rifles at airports; are we expecting the terrorists to make a ground assault on Charlotte-Douglas International? What, exactly, are the troops doing then? Ah, their mere presence is supposed to reassure the flying public that the airports are "more secure." Okay, whatever. We've still got the "Fred and Ethel Mertz Security Company" running the x-ray machines, and stories of a guy with a shotgun in his carry-on duffle bag getting past "security" workers who couldn't make the grade running the french-fry machine at Burger King — and the only reason we know about that is he went through the security area a second time and got caught then. If he hadn't stepped outside for a smoke after getting though "security" the first time, nobody would have known. Wow! I'm feeling more secure already!

The Democrats' answer to this is to federalize the airport security people. Yeah, that's the ticket. Is there anything at all that the Government does well? No, they pretty much screw up everything they touch, so let's put 'em in charge of airport security. Brilliant! I mean, wasn't it Government Employees who allowed the terrorists into the country in the first place and then didn't do anything when some of them overstayed their Visas? The INS, FBI, CIA all dropped the ball on these guys and their attack plans, but yet we should have more Government employees to "protect us" at airports because Government employees do such a great job. Uh-huh. If the FAA was doing it's job and mandating high standards and strict regulations on the airport security companies, they'd hire competent employees (and pay them well) and you could fire those who don't perform. Government employees essentially cannot be fired when they screw up — witness the fact that the heads of the FAA, INS, CIA and FBI still have their jobs after their respective agencies failed to protect the people of this country.

So anyway, now we can't take our Swiss Army knives (or fingernail clippers or tweezers or any other "weapon") on an airplane, which leaves the law-abiding public completely defenseless. There was an incident where a pilot (for Northwest, I think) caused a ruckus at the security area when they told him he had to remove his fingernail clippers from his carry-on bag, since those are now "weapons," and he got angry about it. I guess nobody bothered to think about the fact that the pilot has a fire axe mounted right behind his seat in the cockpit, eh? It's typical Government thinking to say, "Okay, so the current security measures at our airports failed; let's do the same thing, only more so!" I note that one of the definitions of "insanity" is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.

As the Government is busy making the passengers helpless, Abdul J. Terrorist is getting hired as a minimum-wage plane cleaning employee and planting guns on an airplane or doing any other number of things to get weapons onboard. Sorry, but there aren't enough "Air Marshals" to go around, and if the hijackers happen to pick another airliner that's flying without a Marshal, the passengers are going to have to try and resist using only their bare hands. The Government won't allow pilots to carry pistols (though they used to be required to carry a firearm back before the 60's, if the airplane was carrying any U.S. Mail. Passengers used to carry-on their cased hunting rifles and shotguns back then, too; go figure), but they'll be quick to send up an F-16 fighter or two to fire missles at the plane if it gets taken over by terrorists. That makes me want to fly the friendly skies alright... "Oh, yeah, commercial air travel is perfectly safe, and to enhance your safety, we'll shoot you down if your airliner gets hijacked." Thanks a lot, fellas, but I think maybe I'll just drive to my destination instead, okay?

Actually, I don't think anybody will be hijacking an airliner anytime soon, but I still won't get on an airplane until the Government stops taking me for a fool and gets serious about security on airplanes. Like arming the pilots, and perhaps even allowing local law enforcement officers and (gasp!) lawful citizens with concealed carry permits to board aircraft with their weapons. It's ludicrous that thousands of Federal employees (Dept. of Interior, EPA, Dept. of Agriculture, etc. — and can anyone tell me exactly why some frickin' bureaucrat at the Ag Department needs to be packing a pistol?) can breeze right through security at an airport carrying a firearm, but a city cop has to leave his gun at home if he's getting on a plane to go visit Grandma.

THE AMERICAN PEOPLE
The people in this country haven't been as united since World War II, and have responded to the attacks of 9-11 with over a billion dollars in donations to the victims ($200 million of which those thieves at the Red Cross are "diverting" to other projects), though for some reason the big charities aren't managing to get the money to those victims. Perhaps the fact that those donated millions are sitting in the bank gathering interest for the charities has something to do with that, I dunno.

The FBI just put out another "Terrorism Alert," but with no specific information on what we should be on the "alert" for. That's helpful. Thanks, boys. The Fibbies also want to run every e-mail and web page through a FBI-controlled server somewhere, so they can monitor what people are doing on the Internet. First of all, I thought they were already illegally reading all our e-mail with their damned "Carnivore" software. Secondly, passing all Internet traffic through some central location not only screams "slow 'Net traffic bottleneck!" but provides a truly tempting single target for scads of hackers. That setup would be a disaster waiting to happen, for all kinds of reasons.

Meanwhile, Reichkommissar Tom Ridge of the Ministry of Homeland Security (Heil!) and Reichsfüehrer John Ashcroft have gleefully been granted sweeping new police powers to use in the name of "terrorism," but which actually were things that the Federal Gestapo has wanted since long before 9-11. Greatly expanded wiretap powers, warrantless entries and searches, seven-day detainments (they wanted 30 days), and God knows what else... I read something about the FBI considering the possibility of torturing terrorism suspects as a means of getting them to cough up more info. No more "You have the right to remain silent," eh?

Some of these things are scarier than what the terrorists have done... It'd be nice if, for once, the Government would concentrate on getting the terrorists rather than going after the law-abiding citizens of this country.

But it seems that even though the Government completely failed to provide for the security of the American people on September 11, (one of the few things the Constitution authorizes the Government to do), the majority of Americans are more than ready to roll over and give away their few remaining liberties for the Government's empty promise of more "security" through new restrictive laws.

"Trust us," say the Feds. "We'll get it right next time, if only you'll give up a few more of your Fourth Amendment rights, some more of what privacy you still have, and maybe a few other things, too..."

We'd do well to heed the words of Ben Franklin:

They that can give up essential liberty to obtain a little temporary safety deserve neither liberty nor safety.

Many Americans, it seems, realize that the Government can't protect them and they are buying firearms at an increased rate — including a lot of first-time buyers who never would have considered purchasing a gun until now. Though I'm not sure that we need to worry about having to use a revolver to defend private homes from terrorist attacks, I do think it's a Good Thing™ that people are waking up and taking responsibility for their own safety — whether from terrorists or other criminals.

I just hope that in the Government's efforts to "win the war on terrorism" that they don't destroy America in order to "save" it.

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